Read this article on yawning. You don’t even have to read it. Just scroll through it.
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Yawning
Pandiculation
How many times did you yawn during it? Feel free to comment, if you don’t fall asleep first.
Call yourself a hipster or not, I am sure that you’ve partaken in some sort of fashion, beer, music, what-have-you. We’ve all done it. It’s hard not to when you see it everywhere. This is a good attempt at decoding some of this nonsense.
When we see hipsters everywhere we know them, and can pick our their type. There’s no need to pick them out of a crowd, for they are the crowd. I’ve had many conversations about who and where they’ve come from and what we can compare them to in our past. Because, let’s face it. That’s what we do. We look at something in our lives and take a look at history and try to explain it through something familiar to us. It’s how we function, usually.
At first you could say they are comparative to the hippie. But the hippie fought for something right? Peace…..free love….weed. They were fighting for something then, being constructive and demanding. It wasn’t something everyone else made fun of. It was envied and thought of as new. Then I thought, maybe they could be like the Beats- people who have an intellectualism going for themselves. Then I remembered that hipsters aren’t too intellectual and just wear a same brand of strange clothes like the beats did. Then this article (see above link) was presented to me, and it makes perfect sense.
“An artificial appropriation of different styles from different eras, the hipster represents the end of Western civilization – a culture lost in the superficiality of its past and unable to create any new meaning. Not only is it unsustainable, it is suicidal. While previous youth movements have challenged the dysfunction and decadence of their elders, today we have the “hipster” – a youth subculture that mirrors the doomed shallowness of mainstream society.”
When you see another Christmas sweater, or go into Urban Outfitters thinking it’s going to be a good choice (when it’s not) or when you move to Brooklyn to take photos with your fish eye and go see Best Coast, think again. What’s really going on here?
You can’t reinvent the wheel, but you can reinvent the stove. And that’s exactly what The William did. They’ve created a new stove which ditched the concept of individual burners. The William informs us that “about 75% of the stovetop doesn’t do a thing,” so they went ahead and developed a contact-activated surface which heats up below any pot or pan on the surface, insuring a “perfectly even distribution of heat.”
This is awesome, and in ten years, it could be as common in kitchens as the microwave is today.
But as for now, it might be too technologically overwhelming for the standard housewife. A control panel allows users to set auto functions and program signature-specific information. If I presented this stove to my mother, she wouldn’t use these functions. I guarantee it. She doesn’t know how to access her e-mail and still leaves voice messages telling me to “call back when I get a chance.” If she had this installed in her kitchen, there would be a slew of questions. First, “how do I turn it on?” followed questions about the concept and concerns of it burning down the house. My mother, like most people, are conditioned to turning on individual burners with a simple dial.
user-friendly
To the makers of the William; I credit you for a stove that utilizes 85% of the surface area for cooking. The whole idea of this stove is revolutionary, but no matter how user-friendly you make it, it probably won’t be simple enough.
We all know someone who might be a hoarder. They can’t pass up a good deal. They’ll buy another one before using the one they’ve got. They can’t part with things. They’ll use it, they promise. Yeah, yeah, save it for someone who cares. They accumulate, accumulate, accumulate.
Here’s the revelatory list. You might be a hoarder if…
10. You keep extra “Fire” packets from Taco Bell, in case you want to spice up some food at home.
fire bad
9. You have more than one bottle of conditioner open at a time.
8. You have more than two piles of dirty laundry.
7. You need to follow narrow paths in the carpet to get from one place to the next.
stacks
6. You’ve noticed that parts of the bread are moldy. (“Some of it can be salvaged though,” you’re thinking. No. It can’t).
5. You keep something with no sentimental value that’s broken: “Hey man, I had to borrow a pen, but it wasn’t working, so then I tried another one I saw right next to it, and that one didn’t have any ink in it either. What’s up with that?” / “Oh, did you get it from my windowsill? Because that’s where I keep my dead pens.”
4. You always have something to blow your nose with. Often, it is either used, crumpled up in a tight ball, and from a fast food joint.
3. You have more than two flavors of cream cheese in your fridge. Both are opened and one is beginning to mold.
ehh
2. You collect “collections.”
1. You are oblivious of the shows Hoarding: Buried Alive and Hoarders.
Congratulations to Adam Berley, who found the video for the commercial in question – Vytorin.
Your check, Adam, is in the mail!*
*No it’s not
Pizzle is back to tell us what he thinks of the New Yorker Cartoons.
Pizzle the Sage from thacant dotcom on Vimeo.
Here are some websites I’ve come across. You should click them because, well, they’re worth clicking.
http://helvetictoc.com/ aka How Hipsters Tell Time
http://www.unitunitunit.com/qwertybeats/ aka Compose music for a techno party straight from your keyboard
http://travel.nationalgeographic.com/travel/national-parks/infinite-photo/ aka “Duuude, click over there.” “Whoa.”
Hambelly
Tipsi Pepsi Topsi
Circles Lead to Nowhere.
While creating this post, I remembered a commercial from a while back, maybe two or three years ago. In the ad, a spokesperson informs us consumers that some condition – I think it’s high blood pressure, is determined by two things: genetics and diet. The imagery for the ad assists in marrying this concept. Different family members are shown with plates of food, which look like themselves. The one image I recall is a robust woman in yellow clothing with a lot of makeup holding a meatloaf with a slice of pineapple on top. There were a few other pictures – a grandfather was likened to a platter of pigs-in-a-blanket or something like that… My question is DOES ANYONE ELSE REMEMBER THIS AD?
And if so, can you find it online? If you find it, or if you can help me recall the name of the medication, YOU WIN! That’s right, five dollar bill, in the mail, to your address. Cheers.
rock on
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