Conspiracy

I’m walking around Wegmans the other day, and naturally, I’m drawn to the beer displays. A huge stack of Budweiser Select 30s stick out to me. Black cans with red type and whitish/silvery designs.

budsel

bud select

The label of Bud Select, Budweisers newer, low calorie product, is eerily similar to that of Coke Zero; Coke’s newer lower calorie product.

coke zero

coke zero

See what I mean?

Budweiser, the original, and regular Coca-Cola have not-so-different labels themselves. Classic red and white, as seen in Labor Day cookout coolers seen growing up.

What does that mean? The weaker of each of the Bud and Coke family. Bud Light and Diet Coke. They’re labels aren’t similar. Blue and silver, with a little bit of red on Bud Light, silver and red for Diet Coke. They’re the “other” in each of the families. The black sheep. Ugly duckling. And what can we say about their drinkers? Women who work in offices, rationalizing the half-dozen eclaires they have at lunch by the Diet Coke they had as a mid-morning snack. “You want a salad?” / “No, I’ll have a Diet Coke. And the rack of ribs.”

think this, but more arm pudge

think this, but more arm pudge

And the Bud Light drinkers. “Bro, you want a beer?” / “If by beer you mean Bud Light then hell yes Broseph!”

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its just fun

I cannot believe I’ve gone this long without posting about the Beatles! ………oh, wait, remember this?

But this one is just cooler. And more fun. Simple and easy to follow. Its just fun.

you know..

you know..

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Cross Country Team Sees Record Crowds

The Ithaca College Men’s Cross Country Team had a record crowd yesterday, as tickets were made available for the Annual Cortaca Jug game. The distribution of the tickets took place between 4pm and 10pm in the Hill Center Lobby. As many eager students waited in line to obtain their pass to inebriated fanship, the members of the cross country team performed their daily core and flexibility exercises in front of the gymnasium. The last time students saw the team run was when some girl was doing the walk of shame from the Circles as the Alumni Run, which loops around the rape trail – er Flora Brown Drive – and the trails behind Terraces, took off.

Senior cross country runner Scott Walker claims that “he’s never seen so many people,” to watch cross country practice, no less.

Fed Jimenez was among those in line as the team was preparing for their Tuesday long-run: “I was by uh, Conservatory Circle, in line for my ticket, and I saw all these mufqers in short shorts and tank tops doing push-ups, sit-ups, leg swings. Pssh, I didn’t care about seeing that. I just wanted my ticket. Chump!”

Ticket distribution continues today outside the Ben Light Gymnasium from 4 til 10. The cross-country team will be performing drills from 4:00 til 4:15 in front of the Hill Center. In case of rain, catch them doing their exercises inside the gym.

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I’m confused

The Gannett Center. Ever heard of it? That’s because it’s what 99% of students call “the Library,” and I’m sick of all this confusion with “what floor am I on?”

Libraries serve as meccas of information, hubs of learning on campus. The library is a place where random groups in class often meet to do projects, but how can any work be done if there is a huge dilemma with meeting up in the first place.

“Where are you? I’m on the second floor.”

“The second floor or the first floor?”

“The second floor. Well the main floor.”

“So, the first floor…”

“I’m on the floor marked 2, the one you come in when you enter the library, with all the computers, and the desks – the main floor!”

elevator signage

elevator signage

In the elevator, this red sign is the only thing helping us out. Next to the “2″ button, the sign reads, “Library 1st floor.” Thanks.

""""MAIN"""" floor

Library First Floor, Gannett Second Floor

This is the Main Floor.

Library Second, Gannett Third

Library Second, Gannett Third

Next floor up.

Library Third, Gannett Fourth

Library Third, Gannett Fourth

Floor after that.

shaft

shaft

And the fifth floor, so deserted, quiet and overlooked that it doesn’t even get a sign. All it gets is this original-issue “Quiet Study Area” sign.

So where are we? When in the Ithaca College Library, keep in mind, you are in a building much greater than just that – you are in the Gannett Center; home of the Handwerker Gallery, the Art History Department, the Anthropology Department, and, of course, the library.

Thanks to Brian Ivory for the phone pics, and the shared angst.

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IMG_1052

.....mmmmmmmmm

My sister Zoe and I graduated from Ithaca College and high school respectively and so we shared a cake.

Besides the point- I’ve found a blog, which really isn’t that great. But I want to share it with you! It’s a blog about cake disasters with misspellings, freaky cakes, inappropriateness and what-have-you.

Have you ever had a cake misspelling? Or a cake gone wrong? Let’s get interactive here.

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even thouh i just saw this movie for the first time not too long ago, im still not sure what to think about it....

even thouh i just saw this movie for the first time not too long ago, im still not sure what to think about it....

Once again comes a post for the prime target audience. Brought to us from Spike (TV? the TV channel? not sure?) it is the top ten movies that douche bags love. I came across this early this afternoon and laughed right out loud. It was almost a bad moment because I was surfing the web while two people behind me were having an actual conversation. [And if you know me, you know that I am one to burst out in my own fits of laughter into a computer screen.] —-

——Some of the movies on this list I love, and some are for serious great movies, while others are just for fun- I am just the messenger so don’t think I am the one pigeonholing these movies: I am simply pigeonholing these douche bags. I’d like to think that I know no one like this but I’m sure we all know someone of the brand. I can agree with a lot of these decisions and can judge based on the fact that I’ve seen six of these movies and large parts of one (decide for yourself! — always fun.) But mostly, and always, I want to spark some fun. See what you think.

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Artsy

Fall Break has come and gone. But it was a great time for us to stray away from campus and create or find our own art. Let’s see what’s been done in the Thursday and Friday we students have stretched into a five-day bender…

bridge monster

Medium: Chalk on Iron

I found this angry chalk monster on the metal bridge on E. Clinton Street. If you’re leaving the police station after paying an exorbitant ticket for having a party at your apartment, or coming home from the Commons, keep your eyes open.

Medium: Spray Paint on Wood

Medium: Spray Paint on Wood

Don’t know what this means or why it was created. “Chee Dung” it says, with the former word’s letters taking the shape of a pile of the latter word. Looks homemade, though. Rock on!

Medium: Paint on Cement

Medium: Paint on Cement

Junior TV-R major Anthony Palma sent me this “fresh” graffiti straight from East Brunswick, New Jersey. If you can’t read it, I’ll help you decode; NF&ES^>TZ@,{ *.

Medium: Caution Tape on Wood and Air

Medium: Caution Tape on Wood and Air

The least conventional art I came across was Thursday night, when I enter a Grandview basement to find Nate Scull meandering a spider web of caution tape. Cheers to you Scull.

Fall Break is a mere two days off from classes, not even enough time to warrant my five-hour drive back home. Thanksgiving break is just over four weeks away, and oh, the art we’ll come across with nine days away from campus.

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I hate smoothies. To me, they don’t taste good. I’m an ice cream guy. But I love making smoothies. My routine at the Freshen’s Smoothie hut at the Campus Center never budged, until today. I’ve been mastering the art (because it is an art, indeed) of making smoothies for four years. From Maui Mango’s to Jamaican Jammers, my smoothies have touchedFreshens BnM logo the lives of many people from all parts of the world throughout the little openings of their busy schedules in the week.

As I was pouring a Strawberry Sunrise into a 16 oz. cup, it flowed out of the blender like a heavenly fruity river of righteousness, smooth enough to consider it a waterfall, during sunrise, but with strawberries. I was taken aback four years ago …

… where a younger, dumber, sniffling from a cold, foul-mouthed, and far less serious freshman version of myself, was pouring the same Sunrise into the same cup. It wasn’t a river of righteousness. It was a messy, clumpy mistake.

It was my first day on the job.

My first week on a college campus.

My first encounter with work study.

I came into work sniffling from a little cold, thinking I was the greatest thing since slice bread because I didn’t get thrown into the Dining Hall like most freshmen did for work study. I’m going to be making some smoothies, or some “smooth ass smoothies” as my best friend would say, working at Binghamton University’s version of the Freshen’s Smoothie hut at the same time.

I remember dropping everything. Thinking raspberries were blueberries, strawberries were raspberries, pineapples were mangos, and mangos were peaches, it was all confusing to me.

“I’m not a fruit guy. I hate fruits and vegetables and good healthy stuff like that,” is what I thought to myself at first.

“Now I got to make fruity drinks and shakes for people?”

So I had no choice but to treat this situation as another obstacle in life; an objective. It was ugly at first, dropping everything, spilling coffee, getting screamed at by co-workers and supervisors, but it sure was a lot of fun, because it is how I met a lot of people. So the only things I cared about were perfecting the smoothie at hand, and meeting new people.

This has been my formula for four years. I have learned a lot about myself and the world, and have been on many life adventures through the initial friends that I have met on those early, clumpy smoothie-making days. Through time and many life lessons, the smoothies got smoother and smoother…

… Until right now, as I pour a Strawberry Sunrise into a 16 oz. cup, with it flowing out of the blender like a heavenly fruity river of righteousness, smooth enough to consider it a waterfall, during sunrise, but with strawberries.

This is my Ode to the Smoothie. You have been the backbone of many life lessons. Now I pour you with the uttermost smoothness a man can offer.

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Credit Where Credit Is Due

Sometimes stuff that sucks can do something cool once in a while. Like when that loser from fifth grade has everyone from the grade over for a huge pool party. His parents hope he’ll make friends that way, but you’re just there for the diving board and Ruffles chips. Bud Light Sucks, I maintain that.

I walk into Wegmans last night and get the usual barrage of Bud Light advertisements. BL Lime, there’s even a new BL Golden Wheat, whatever the hell that is. But this one ad caught my eye…

and the love below

and the love below

This “tailgate-approved” 24-pack has speakers and an MP3 connection. Ideal for pre-gaming in a parking lot, grilling burgers outside stadiums, or being a bro.

bom bom beedom

bom bom beedo

I guess this is pretty cool. Still doesn’t compare to the Natty Caddy though.

get our your nattlas

get our your nattlas

I was warming up to the idea of testing out this speakerbox. Then I got home and, while watching Dateline NBC’s “To Catch a Predator” per my Sunday night routine, noticed that some pervert brought 12 condoms, flowers, a corset, and you guessed it, a 12 of Bud Light to some potential rape victims house. Perverts: 0, Bud Light: -1, Natty: 1up.

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stuff white kids like

Approved by Mr. Gary Omar Damany Walker the Jamaican representative for Ithaca,NY- living in peace with black and white conformity- with the help of me, he has assembled a list of

WHITE KID MUSIC

now- as some of these are my favorite and all-time favorite artists, these are not my choices of ranking. they just are. i am at peace with this and can deal with it. for i am only here to create conversation, let’s hear what you have to say.

1. Simon & Garfunkle

2. Billy Joel

3. the Grateful Dead

4. Talking Heads Neil Young

5. KISS

6. Bob Dylan

7. Wilco

8. Dr. Dog Nirvana/the Foo Fighters

9. Johnny Cash

10. Lynard Skynard

honorable mentions include: 1) Talking Heads 2) the Doors 3) Dr. Dog 4) Hootie and the Blowfish 5) Hall & Oates

i was raised in suburbia, usa in south jersey (and even though i am not proud of it- i deal on a daily basis.) able to recognize how to and am already am successful in escaping the small town life- and although i do not agree with these choices- i understand why they are here. thank you omar for you are a great friend because there are no boundaries with you.

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