You can’t reinvent the wheel, but you can reinvent the stove. And that’s exactly what The William did. They’ve created a new stove which ditched the concept of individual burners. The William informs us that “about 75% of the stovetop doesn’t do a thing,” so they went ahead and developed a contact-activated surface which heats up below any pot or pan on the surface, insuring a “perfectly even distribution of heat.”

This is awesome, and in ten years, it could be as common in kitchens as the microwave is today.
But as for now, it might be too technologically overwhelming for the standard housewife. A control panel allows users to set auto functions and program signature-specific information. If I presented this stove to my mother, she wouldn’t use these functions. I guarantee it. She doesn’t know how to access her e-mail and still leaves voice messages telling me to “call back when I get a chance.” If she had this installed in her kitchen, there would be a slew of questions. First, “how do I turn it on?” followed questions about the concept and concerns of it burning down the house. My mother, like most people, are conditioned to turning on individual burners with a simple dial.

user-friendly

To the makers of the William; I credit you for a stove that utilizes 85% of the surface area for cooking. The whole idea of this stove is revolutionary, but no matter how user-friendly you make it, it probably won’t be simple enough.

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Beat the Heat

I just got back from a run, my third since getting to the Bronx. Damn it’s hot out. It’s late June, 92 degrees, and humidity’s high, not to mention all the concrete and pavement soaking up the sun. After ten minutes outside my t-shirt was soaked. In the last half-mile my form had gone to shit: my feet were scuffling, my knees bent inward. Like any good long run during the summer, I had a punishing stomach cramp. Unfortunately for me, this wasn’t a long run per se. Based on my appearance this afternoon, nobody would believe that I was a decorated track and cross-country athlete.

While the Bronx isn’t host to the expansive variety of running terrain that Ithaca offered, I still find that there are plenty of places to get miles in. Van Cortland Park, famous for it’s cross-country trails is thirty blocks away. I haven’t made my way up there yet, but I’ve come across some awesome places to run within minutes of my apartment.

The entrance to the New York Botanical Gardens is less than a half-mile from my doorstep. Admission to the Gardens is $12, but luckily (for me at least), Fordham students and runners gain free admission. The place is beautiful – there are tons of running trails, wide paths free of cars (but plenty of golf carts), and water fountains galore.

not-a-mirage

Pedestrians and paying visitors can check out the greenhouse, conservatory, arboretums and rhododendron gardens. I, on the other hand, strictly stay on the trails – I don’t want to abuse the privilege of my free entry. The Gardens are truly an oasis considering the urbanity and chaos in the surrounding neighborhoods. This is on the short list of places in New York City where you can spot wildlife (pigeons and rats not included).

The Botanical Gardens as well as the Bronx Zoo, are a part of a large set of land called Bronx Park. The name is cliché, but the paths there are enjoyable. It came into existence in the 1880s when there was a movement to create public parks. (The angst due to lack of backyards had finally boiled over!) Bronx Park is a huge area of preserved land along the Bronx River. The paths are windy, and pass under bridges: The Bronx Parkway runs more-or-less parallel to the Bronx River.

troll haven

Here, runners don’t have to stop for traffic and we can escape the streets for a few miles, and the canopy above provides welcome shade in the summer – and probably a shield from the rain. The downside is that it’s littered and there are no clean-up efforts in sight: On my run I saw cigarette butts, food wrappers, some dumped trash, even a pay-phone in the river below one of the bridges. Bronx Park is also a venue for lecherous activity: Bottle caps, condom wrappers, questionable individuals sitting on benches. The pungent smell of vinegar is pervasive here and I don’t know why. Regardless, the escape from honking taxis, curiously loud Civics and exhaust fumes is worth the perils of running in the park.

I wiped sweat from my brow along a path. Looking ahead I saw piles of clothing, sneakers and gold chains on the ground. Down a slope I saw a handful of Bronx youth swimming in the River. It was a hot day, and any respite from the humidity would have been welcome. I just couldn’t bear to watch these kids swim in such murky water. Not after seeing that rusted pay-phone upstream. Besides, this is where the ducks, flamingos and turtles at the Zoo swim.

lock jaw

I saw a sprinkler at Fordham University’s main traffic entrance. I slowed down and let it splash my face. I nearly made a wrong turn due to heat delirium, but finally made it home, to take off my shoes and slouch in front of my air-conditioner, ice-water in hand.

But I don’t come here to babble about personal endeavors or whine about the heat. I come here to provoke thought, respond to culture and to bring phone pics to life. If you really want to read about personal fitness, please check out Tim Shea’s Dairyland Memoirs on NotDrugs.com. His tribulations regarding re-fitness are something to laugh at, even if he doesn’t want you to. Enjoy.

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Preparations for Senior Week

For the first time since August the fountains at Dillingham are filled with water.

I’m sure I’m not the first to say that they should have been filled weeks ago. We’re still waiting on the anchored fountains to spray the water in the air to achieve the postcard look, but we’ll take what we can get.

finally full

I can’t wait to hear about how many kids get written up for trespassing and swimming into the fountains before Senior Week. But I also heard that since Judicial Referrals are more paperwork than they’re worth, that the school has done away with that punitive measure – jump on in Seniors!

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Good Work, students

Ithaca students are doing some pretty cool stuff. Brooks Binau, senior audio-prod major wrote and recorded a song every day for the month of February. I missed out on seeing him live, but here he is covering Fatboy Slim’s Praise You.

Brian Ivory and Nate Scull, senior Politics Minors have been working on an investigative piece on Iraq War veterans. Click here to see what they found out!

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Welcome Back

On the eve of his brand-new stage show, hilariously titled-“Legally Prohibited from Being Funny on Television Tour,” TBS announced that it has reached a deal with Conan O’Brien to headline his own late night show starting in November.  Obviously, I had many reactions upon hearing the news, and I am sure that you all did as well.  Here were my initial quick-hit reactions:

1. First and foremost, Conan O’Brien will be back, being funny on television again.  We all win.

2. Brilliant move for Conan and for TBS.  Conan’s brand of humor (bits, sarcasm,etc.) never quite felt right on The Tonight Show stage.  Part of what made Conan so successful on “Late Night” was the freedom he had to push the envelope and do comedy he wanted to do.  When he moved into the earlier time slot, NBC pulled him in quite a bit.  Why hand over the most successful franchise in television to a rising star and then force him to alter his style?

3. On TBS, Conan will have the freedom to be as edgy as he wants, and will have complete control over his show and its content.  A great move for Conan, but also for TBS.

4. Conan will be a success no matter what the numbers say.  No he will not get the ratings of Letterman or Leno or probably even Kimmel.  But is that what he is going for?  TBS is a cable network, reaches less homes, and does not have the late-night pedigree.  Conan will no doubt draw bigger rating than “Lopez Tonight” has for TBS and will be a huge winner over other cable networks showing re-runs of old sitcoms.  Conan will massively improve TBS ratings and that is how his success should be measured.  This is not about Conan vs NBC or CBS or FOX.  This is just about Conan getting a chance to be funny on television again.

5. Conan O’Brien is the comedy voice of the younger generation and this move shows how much he understands that.  He gets to go to a smaller, cable network, do whatever comedy he wants, and be as edgy as he wants.  NBC’s average audience that watches The Tonight Show is almost 60 years old, TBS’ average audience is 33.  Conan understands what demographic gets him and what demographic finds him sophomoric.  With this move, Conan is embracing his young following, and will no doubt be embraced by them once again.

6. I love the “COCO is with us” commercials currently running on TBS.

I guess that is all I have for Conan right now.  I know that many more of you who follow our little blog are Conan fans.  What do you guys think of this move?  Clearly, I like it.  Can’t wait to see the Walker Texas Ranger lever make its return!

 

And how am I so certain? Take a look:

right in the center there

Upon getting back from Spring Break, I noticed there was a “yield for pedestrians” sign in my oft-traveled crosswalk on Farm Road and Grant Egbert Boulevard. This is the same crosswalk that, months ago, after near collisions, I insisted was in need of one of these signs.

Where else was there public outcry? Who else has voiced the dangers of crosswalks lacking such signage? The Ithacan? The Ithaca Times, Journal. No, no and no.

‘Twas thacant.

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Do You Have the Time(s)?

Ithaca College’s Communication College, the Park School is named after Roy H. Park. Let’s first go through a run-down of things you probably don’t know about the man behind the moniker.

Was born in 1910 in Dobson, North Carolina

Attended N.C. State, majoring in Business Administration and writing for the school paper, the Technician

Moved to Ithaca in 1942 to take a job (The building next to Viva Taqueria is named after Park).

Began a Communications Consortium, controlling seven television stations, seven AM and seven FM radio stations, as well as a number of publications.

At one time, Forbes listed Park as one of the forty richest men in the U.S.

Park sat on the Board of Trustees at Ithaca College for a number of years and the school was named after him in 1989.

His likeness can be seen in the lobby of the school – near the coffee kiosk towards the stairs.

Park himself

But take a closer look, down at the wrists.

double-wristing

A watch on each hand. Take Forbes’ word for it – the man was wealthy. But philanthropic, too. Since 1997, The Park Foundation has left over $12 million in scholarships to help over 170 students.

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Cornell’s Johnson Museum

I finally made it to the Johnson Museum over at Cornell. You know, this one:

Johnson

This museum has a few permanent collections of art, as well as constantly-changing contemporary collections. But the main attraction at the Johnson is the view. High up on Libe Slope, the fifth floor of the museum offers incredible views of Ithaca and the surrounding areas. The lake, downtown, the hills, and surrounding campuses are spectacular yet humbling.

Cayuga

Being Cornell, though, I thought some of the art would be elitist, high-brow, somewhat snooty and incomprehensible for someone not well-versed in the field of art history. I went to the top floor for the view, but when I scoped out some of the displays, all I saw was this:

bubble bubble

I thought you could pick one of those up at the Commons – don’t know why you’d have to go to a museum to see it.

Then, there was this naked chick:

Exhibition(ist) A

Get some clothes on, hippy.

Turns out that the famed Johnson Museum is no exception to the liberal lifestyle that is nearly normalized in Ithaca. Anyways, if anyone knows of some REAL museums in the area, let me know.

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Here are a list of things that have been annoying me lately:

-People bitching on their facebook status about snow

-People constantly updating their facebook status (how about instead of doing that 8 times a day, you get a life instead? just a thought)

-People who write long statuses and or notes on facebook in which they try to bring up serious topics and seem wise (instead of seeming wise, you seem quite, quite douchey)

-People who end their sentences with questions.  I’m trying to have a conversation, not be interrogated here.

-Everyone overusing the word “extreme.”  How is everything extreme?  It makes no sense people, I doubt that my  deodorant is  extreme, but the label says it is.

-Night classes

-Bandwagon fans who all of a sudden love sports teams that they cannot name more than one player on (yes, USA hockey fans, I am talking to ALL of you)

-People who break up and get back together all the time (just pick something and stick to it, you aren’t Ross and Rachel)

-People whose only source of humor is quoting movies, let’s get some original material people.

And finally, my number one pet peeve lately………………

-2nd Floor letting TONS of underage kids in.  Has anyone else noticed this?  When we were younger we had to wait to get into the bars, now that sleazy bouncer at 2nd floor (you all know who Im talking about) is letting all these underage kids in.  It makes the bar more crowded and makes it harder to get a drink (it’s already hard enough at 2nd floor as they have the SLOWEST bartenders in all of Ithaca, hey bartenders stop hiring your girlfriend and hire people who know how to make a damn drink and be snappy about it!). Plus as someone who is of legal age, seeing the annoying juniors in the bar who think they are soooo cool because they are in the bar drives me to drink even more which wouldn’t be a problem if I could get a damn drink in that bar.

That’s what is annoying me this week.  What’s annoying you?  Comments people, let’s make this a weekly thing.

 

NeW bAtHrOoM oN cAmPuS!?1!?!Z!!?!?!

I decided to take a new route from Friends to my noon class in Smiddy – why, I don’t know, nor does it matter – like it didn’t matter why Lewis and Clark trekked out to the West Coast. They made a discovery and so did I.

But instead of a new territory, I found a new bathroom, recently opened after the construction in the greener area of campus. But this bathroom is magnificent, luxurious, host to two rows of urinals!

Left side

To the right

This bathroom is so fresh, so new – I figured it just opened today – and that I, yes I, was among the first to use it. Upon closer inspection (note the trash bin) I wasn’t the first to use it. And if it did open today, the janitors haven’t been doing a good job emptying these paper towels.

Did I mention the stalls?! They are complete with the green handle for liquid or solid waste:

I am not an infant!

But, similar to the extremely short bubblers in the business school, these toilets are a foot off the ground! I almost expect to see one of those rings around it so children don’t fall in. I’m over six feet, dammit!

I remember, as a child, visiting historical sites from the 1800s. At these old houses, railings were at my father’s knees, people had to duck to get through doors, and, as the tour guide reminded us, Abe Lincoln was considered a giant at six foot three.

The construction workers and plumbers must have been under the impression that they were building a historical replica of a bathroom for such a house – not for a state-of-the-art green building.

Makes me sick.

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